Archive for the 'e-mail' Category

Quiz time

serial-or-program.gif

Someone emailed me this link.  All I’m saying is don’t rely on me if you’re trying to find a serial killer, I seem to attribute the worst characteristics to poor innocent computer geeks.

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LOL Monday

seen-the-end-again.jpg

Not sure who gets credit for this one, I got it in an email the other morning.  But it made me laugh!

Why men shouldn’t write advice columns…

Dear Walter:

 I hope you can help me here.  The other day I set off for work, leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual.  I hadn’t gone more than a few hundred yards down the road when my engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt.  I walked back home to get my husband’s help. When I got home I couldn’t believe my eyes. He was parading in front of the wardrobe mirror dressed in my underwear and high-heel shoes, and he was wearing my make up. I am 32, my husband is 34 and we have been married for twelve years. When I confronted him, he tried to make out that he had dressed in my lingerie because he couldn’t find his own underwear. But when I asked him about the make up, he broke down and admitted that he’d been wearing my clothes for six months. I told him to stop or I would leave him.
 He was let go from his job six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. I don’t feel I can get through to him anymore. Can you please help?

Sincerely, Mrs. Sheila Usk 

Dear Sheila: 


A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the jubilee clips holding the vacuum pipes onto the inlet manifold. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburettor float chamber. I hope this helps.


Walter

Why men shouldn’t write advice columns…

Dear Walter:

 I hope you can help me here.  The other day I set off for work, leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual.  I hadn’t gone more than a few hundred yards down the road when my engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt.  I walked back home to get my husband’s help. When I got home I couldn’t believe my eyes. He was parading in front of the wardrobe mirror dressed in my underwear and high-heel shoes, and he was wearing my make up. I am 32, my husband is 34 and we have been married for twelve years. When I confronted him, he tried to make out that he had dressed in my lingerie because he couldn’t find his own underwear. But when I asked him about the make up, he broke down and admitted that he’d been wearing my clothes for six months. I told him to stop or I would leave him.
 He was let go from his job six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. I don’t feel I can get through to him anymore. Can you please help?

Sincerely, Mrs. Sheila Usk 

Dear Sheila: 


A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the jubilee clips holding the vacuum pipes onto the inlet manifold. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburettor float chamber. I hope this helps.


Walter

Why men shouldn’t write advice columns…

Dear Walter:

 I hope you can help me here.  The other day I set off for work, leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual.  I hadn’t gone more than a few hundred yards down the road when my engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt.  I walked back home to get my husband’s help. When I got home I couldn’t believe my eyes. He was parading in front of the wardrobe mirror dressed in my underwear and high-heel shoes, and he was wearing my make up. I am 32, my husband is 34 and we have been married for twelve years. When I confronted him, he tried to make out that he had dressed in my lingerie because he couldn’t find his own underwear. But when I asked him about the make up, he broke down and admitted that he’d been wearing my clothes for six months. I told him to stop or I would leave him.
 He was let go from his job six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. I don’t feel I can get through to him anymore. Can you please help?

Sincerely, Mrs. Sheila Usk 

Dear Sheila: 


A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the jubilee clips holding the vacuum pipes onto the inlet manifold. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburettor float chamber. I hope this helps.


Walter

Why men shouldn’t write advice columns…

Dear Walter:

 I hope you can help me here.  The other day I set off for work, leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual.  I hadn’t gone more than a few hundred yards down the road when my engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt.  I walked back home to get my husband’s help. When I got home I couldn’t believe my eyes. He was parading in front of the wardrobe mirror dressed in my underwear and high-heel shoes, and he was wearing my make up. I am 32, my husband is 34 and we have been married for twelve years. When I confronted him, he tried to make out that he had dressed in my lingerie because he couldn’t find his own underwear. But when I asked him about the make up, he broke down and admitted that he’d been wearing my clothes for six months. I told him to stop or I would leave him.
 He was let go from his job six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. I don’t feel I can get through to him anymore. Can you please help?

Sincerely, Mrs. Sheila Usk 

Dear Sheila: 


A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the jubilee clips holding the vacuum pipes onto the inlet manifold. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburettor float chamber. I hope this helps.


Walter

Why men shouldn’t write advice columns…

Dear Walter:

 I hope you can help me here.  The other day I set off for work, leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual.  I hadn’t gone more than a few hundred yards down the road when my engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt.  I walked back home to get my husband’s help. When I got home I couldn’t believe my eyes. He was parading in front of the wardrobe mirror dressed in my underwear and high-heel shoes, and he was wearing my make up. I am 32, my husband is 34 and we have been married for twelve years. When I confronted him, he tried to make out that he had dressed in my lingerie because he couldn’t find his own underwear. But when I asked him about the make up, he broke down and admitted that he’d been wearing my clothes for six months. I told him to stop or I would leave him.
 He was let go from his job six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. I don’t feel I can get through to him anymore. Can you please help?

Sincerely, Mrs. Sheila Usk 

Dear Sheila: 


A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the jubilee clips holding the vacuum pipes onto the inlet manifold. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburettor float chamber. I hope this helps.


Walter


blog portion

portion? (pôr'shən, pōr'-) n. 1. A section or quantity within a larger thing; a part of a whole. 2. A part separated from a whole. 3. A part that is allotted to a person or group, as: i. A helping of food. ii. The part of an estate received by an heir. iii. A woman's dowry. 4. A person's lot or fate. loves to stitch! "We don't see things as they are, we see things as we are." - Anais Nin

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